Pat Pat

PAT

"I feel that all my life experiences have brought me to where I am and I can actually put some of that knowledge to use in the community, which I find really rewarding."

Pat has a dream. She would like to organise a local Sydenham support group for carers of people with mental illness. Her personal experiences, from childhood to the present, inform her hopes and give rise to the generous and compassionate woman that is Pat. She approaches her goal one step at a time, weaving each experience into the fabric of her life, not a moment of heartache discarded nor an instance of joy. It is all part of the learning process that Pat embraces.

"I feel that all my life experiences have brought me to where I am and I can actually put some of that knowledge to use in the community, which I find really rewarding." Pat was officially recognised as a carer in 2001 and has been at home full-time, juggling finances to get by, since then. In 2005, through her association with Carers Victoria, she became involved in Power On, a Women's Health West initiative.

In her role as a peer educator, Pat shares her story with other carers, facilitating discussions and offering practical solutions. "That's why I got the job. Being a carer, I can really relate one hundred percent, because I am living it as well." Carers often slip under the radar, often so completely focussed on their dependent, they neglect their own health and their own happiness. "As a carer, you think you don't have rights, that the person you are caring for deserves everything they ask for. You put pressure on yourself. We teach women that if you stand up for yourself, gradually, they will accept it." The strategies are positive, affirmative, action techniques, placing emphasis on practical solutions.

The pressure of full-time caring can take its toll and Pat experienced a breakdown herself. She fully understands the need for compassionate, experienced support services, "When I was in that black hole myself, I called up a crisis line… but I wasn't taken seriously. I ended up staying with a friend for three months. It helped knowing someone was there, keeping me company, not telling me, 'Pull yourself together Pat'. There was a lot of learning going on, but it took me a while to think, 'Yeah, I do want to make a go of life and not be where I am. I used my inner strength.'"

Pat has been incredibly pro-active, seeking out advice and organisations that can help both her and her child. Finding Carers Victoria helped Pat balance her needs whilst caring for her daughter. tapestry image By attending support groups and other activities, she realised how important it is to maintain your own social networks, your own life and your own well-being.

Pat is passionate about helping others. The feedback she gets through her facilitation work constantly inspires her with new ideas. "We offer different strategies, we do many activities that are fun and the carers realise, 'I can light the candles, and soak in the bath and do something for me. I deserve to be taken care of as well and reach out for help' and know they don't have to do it all."